You have tied the knot with your most favorite person in the world and are feeling great. But have you thought whether this stage may or may not be forever? We know that newlywed couples don’t like to think about bad things, but let’s face it, every couple is not perfect and as time goes, chances grow of spoilage of the sweetness in the relationship. And even if you don’t see those chances, there is no harm to know about the mistakes that may lead to this spoilage. You might have taken lessons from your married friends about how to be seductive, but there are many other things you can do to maintain that special place in your spouse’s heart forever.
1. Not Being Respectful
Not being respectful about each other is a common mistake couples make. You should have respect about your spouse and should show it. This doesn’t mean that you should overly show it off. Don’t badmouth her/him to your colleagues or friends, not even in her/his absence. Small things like expressing thanks keep the relationship sweet and fresh, and your spouse realizes that you care, which is important.
2. Not Paying Attention
Not paying attention to what the spouse says is another common mistake in married life. This is a form of disrespect, and being dominating. Remember that you have to run your marriage together and nobody among you is superior or inferior. So, you should pay attention to each other’s opinions and afterwards you can discuss. Being ignorant about what the spouse says may happen purposefully or otherwise, but the effect is same. So, take care to avoid it.
3. Not Having Sexual Closeness
Lack of sexual interest is like a death knell for a marriage. The building of a marriage should have a strong sexual base; only then it can stand erect. If you notice that you or your spouse lacks sexual interest in each other, you should immediately approach a counselor or some other expert in the matter.
4. I am Always Right
Being obstinate about you are always right is harmful too for your marriage. This includes pointing out mistakes of your spouse and speaking in an overly firm way while taking decisions. Admitting your own mistakes is a healthy thing and is healthy for your marriage too.
5. Not Keeping Your Word
Not keeping your word shows the weakness of your character, which can be a cause of disrespect. If you make a promise to your spouse, keep it. And if you don’t want to do a certain thing, declare that you won’t do it and don’t do it. Maintaining firmness about your opinions is also important, which will show your spouse that you are not her/his slave.
6. Cruel Teasing
If your spouse says that your particular teasing is cruel, stop it. Saying that your spouse lacks sense of humor or is too sensitive in such a case is unkind and inconsiderate. Respect the mentality of your spouse.
Keeping secrets in the relationship and hiding things from the spouse can badly spoil the marriage. Trust is very important and you should do everything to maintain it.
8. Being Irritating
Your small personal unhygienic habits or coming late, etc, which you might not have noticed so prominently since your childhood may be irritating for your spouse. If s/he points them out, try to change them totally or at least reduce them. This will show that you care for your spouse.
9. Being Selfish
Forgiving yourself for everything and pointing out small mistakes of your spouse is selfish. E.g. if you spend a lot of money on yourself, but make a big issue if your spouse spends a dime, it is selfish and unkind. Purposefully avoiding high end restaurants when you can afford them or movies your spouse likes is a sign of selfishness.
10. Maintaining an Ego
You should handle a conflict in a constructive way and should not maintain your ego while accepting your spouse’s decision. This is your marriage and not a debate competition where you will be rewarded for making the opposition accept your opinion. Ego and self-respect are different things and you should identify the difference.
As time goes, you may take your partner for granted and mistakes may take place unintentionally. Avoiding them is in your hand and that is the only way to maintain the love in your relationship.