Unlike in the Western world, Indian marriages are largely a matter of meeting of two people who were previously unknown to each other, trying to build a relationship and then tying the knot, not only between those two people, but their families too. Also, Indians believe that marriages indicate a phase in the process of getting settled in life because a marriage is to be continued forever, in any condition, happy or sad, tough or easy. Therefore, a platform like matrimony sites is of great help to parents of young girls and boys and also for the prospective brides and grooms to find desirable partners and in-laws. Here are useful tips to make the correct use of matrimony sites and avoid the potential pitfalls.
1. Don’t Get Carried Away with a Great Profile
It’s natural that a girl or a boy has dreams of getting a great partner with nice looks, lucrative job, fantastic family background and other such attractive qualities. However, remember that there are all kinds of people on the internet including frauds and cheats. Even a photo can be false and the real person may be different than that in the photo. Therefore, you should not get carried away with a seemingly nice profile and should invest time and effort to check the authenticity of the person. It makes perfect sense to first meet the person and spend ample time with her/him and judge her/him from every angle. Also check her/his family and keenly watch if there is something weird that you are not comfortable with or just isn’t making sense. With the modern era, we should keep aside the orthodox tradition of not allowing the girl and boy to spend time with each other and judge each other well. It’s definitely better to check the opposite person well ahead of time than repenting later.
2. How to Scrutinize?
After you meet a person, you can ask her/him questions, meet her/his family and check things. However, how to scrutinize things before this so as to decide whether to meet her/him in person or not? Here Google, LinkedIn and Facebook can provide you a great help. If the person has submitted her/his full name, there are chances that s/he is genuine; but you should check her/his genuineness first by looking them up online. This too has a drawback as this can’t help much especially if the name is not very unique. Look for the name along with her/his educational institute or workplace. Don’t go through just the 1st page of Google search results, but check at least 4-5 pages so as not to skip any news report about her/his past, buried somewhere. Fortunately, most of today’s matrimony sites make it compulsory to register using LinkedIn or Facebook ID, and also providing contact numbers of the user’s friends.
3. Making the First Move
After verifying things online, your first move should be meeting her/him in person and you should not hesitate to do this. After all, you are going to decide whether or not to spend your entire life with that person and the only way to check her/him is to meet her/him. There is nothing to be shy of. Gone are the days when girls and boys, especially girls are supposed to be shy of meeting or talking directly to her potential partner. Today when cases of matrimony frauds are more common than ever, girls too should be cautious enough and instead of being shy or weak, dare to talk to boys and verify everything in detail before getting tied to the person for life.
4. Chat Practically
Online chatting is a very good option offered by matrimony sites of getting connected to a person whose profile seems attractive to you. This way you can talk to that person and judge her/his overall nature, future plans, view about life etc. However, you should be cautious at the same time. You should keep in mind that just because the person chats nicely, you cannot say that s/he is the right partner for you. Check if the person is interested in talking to you about some serious issues of life or just seems to be flamboyant. Remember that there is a difference between flamboyant and lighthearted. Also pay attention to what your instinct says. Don’t hesitate to ask many questions and if s/he takes an objection upon asking so many questions or tries to blackmail you emotionally saying that s/he is feeling bad that you don’t believe her/him, take it as a red signal. If there is nothing wrong in the person’s life, s/he won’t avoid answering your questions.
With that said, it’s also true that you or even the opposite person should not reveal sensitive information like family wealth, bank balance, gold, etc. This is also a good indication to check if the person is genuine or is interested in some other things. Is s/he inquiring too much about your salary, how much you save per month (so that s/he can calculate how much you might have saved by now), how many life insurance policies you have (unless her/his job is insurance-related), or other money-related questions? If s/he is, take it as a warning sign. And be cautious while replying.
5. Don’t Fail to Invest Time
You may find it very boring and sometimes even frustrating to check thousands of useless profiles, sending interest notes, getting positive or negative responses, and overall going through the whole process again and again. However, you should also not fail to invest time in checking the profiles thoroughly and ensuring that they are worth considering. Don’t take hasty decisions just because you are tired of repeating all the steps. It’s a bitter truth that unlike Western people, we Indians cannot break a marriage easily as there are a lot of things involved in it including our families and traditional values. So, be cautious before getting tied into a relationship.
iMarriages is a unique matrimony site which is absolutely free to use and offers not only the information of prospective brides and grooms, but also a lot of other interesting information about advices on marriages, statistics of successful and unsuccessful marriages, world’s most expensive weddings, and more. It is committed to help resident as well as non-resident Indians who can take benefit of their range of services like creating a profile, chatting with prospective partners, tips on relationships and much more, absolutely for free. Don’t miss to take benefit of this awesome service.